The high-level narcissist is a master of taking credit, whether deserved or not, and shifting blame, whether justified or not. After all, in their minds, they are entitled to all credit for success and since they are without fault cannot possibly be blamed for failure. These narcissistic characteristics can best be demonstrated with some examples.

Robert was the General Counsel for a publicly traded corporate conglomerate. His in-house legal staff included lawyers who handled the company's litigation. Robert was a fantastic armchair litigator. From his comfortable leather chair in his corner office with a panoramic view he could successfully argue any case and in these faux courtroom settings would always "win" the case. From time to time it was inevitable that one of the Assistant General Counsels assigned to the litigation department would approach Robert about actually appearing in a real court. Robert would suddenly disappear citing pressing other business until the court proceedings were over.

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....and not even acknowledge it to himself! Why? Because he's off charming the socks off of new women as if your years together didn't even exist!

The narcissistic ex continually acts in abusive, bewildering and confusing ways. He is not above committing destructive acts. When the breakup becomes a reality, it is likely that his 'false persona' will completely disappear all together and you will most likely experience the most hurtful of behavior from him. He is completely lacking in empathy, and - since he is not receiving any admiration from you anymore - he will dismiss you and discard you as worthless to him, consequently dropping any fake front that he use to put up in order to keep you in the relationship. Click here to read 'Breaking Up With a Narcissist' by Tigress Luv

When the company was successful in the litigation, Robert would regale colleagues, friends and even total strangers sitting on the next bar stool at some prestigious watering hole as how his brilliant strategy resulted in a fantastic victory in a hard fought case. On those occasions when the judge or jury rendered a verdict adverse to the company, Robert was quick to find fault with the litigator assigned to the case and point out how the result would have been different if only he had personally handled the trial.

Jay headed the production department of a major television studio. The most important times of the year in the world of television are the pilot season when shows are selected for the coming year and sweeps weeks when the ratings of shows dictate advertising revenues. Jay was never easy to live with, but during these two times of the year he was insufferable. When a selected pilot turned out to be successful, it was due to Jay's brilliant decision to air the show. When ratings tanked it was somehow always the result of some bad advice he took from an underling. Similarly, during sweeps weeks the decision to have a controversial topic on a sit com such as an unwanted pregnancy when successful was Jay's idea and when resulting in bad reviews and low ratings was someone else's fault. Although both Robert's and Jay's disingenuous behavior seems transparent, these narcissists are often materially rewarded in the business world.

This cycle of Taking The Credit - Shifting The Blame speaks to the narcissist's extraordinary sense of self-entitlement. When working for or living with these individuals, it is instructive to be keenly aware of the narcissist's total focus on what he wants and knows that he deserves. The needs, merit, hard work, sacrifices, and feelings of others are inconsequential. This is the narcissist's game: he makes up the rules and cashes in all the chips.

AUTHOR CREDIT

Linda Martinez-Lewi holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is a licensed marriage family therapist. She has extensive clinical training in narcissistic and borderline disorders. Dr. Linda Martinez-Lewi is the author of the book "Freeing Yourself From the Narcissist in Your Life."

Dr. Martinez-Lewi has worked for many years with patients experiencing psychological problems as a result of personal and professional relationships with narcissistic personality disorders. She has clinical experience treating patients suffering from childhood trauma, anxiety disorders, and depression.

Dr. Martinez-Lewi has been interviewed on numerous radio talk shows throughout the country.

Visit her website at: http://www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com

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