The Narcissist May Be a Lonely Man
Narcissists project a fake image; does this mean that nobody really knows the real man underneath enough to love him?
The Narcissist - a Legend in His Own
By Tigress luv, The Break Up
Today the term 'narcissism' is coined from this legend. A narcissist does
not love his true self, but does love the 'false' self that he reflects to
himself and to others.
To better explain, a narcissist creates an outward image of being 'perfect'
and lovable and he then displays this fabricated image to others. He has
given birth to an impression of himself, and never has developed or acknowledged
his 'real' self. He wears this image like a mask, never removing it or revealing
what's underneath it.
The narcissist depends on this 'false image' or rather his 'reflection' to
feel love for himself. Unfortunately, because of this his true self is never
really developed nor loved by him. He feels love for himself only though
the love others have of his projected image. His love, therefore, is not
of himself but of the projected 'image' that other people see him as; the
fake image that he has perfected and emits.
The expression "what you see is what you
get" does not apply to a narcissist. Most assuredly, what you see is not
at all anything even remotely like what you get in the long run. Sure, he
can keep this mask on for a while, but eventually it becomes too much for
him to bear. In the privacy of an intimate relationship his mask is eventually
removed, his 'package' is opened, and his true self emerges.
Once the narcissist is totally revealed you will see a man that is indifferent
and not wanting to be bothered by love or intimacy. Once you have removed
his mask he will leave you feeling like the empty shell that he really is
himself ... an empty shell of a man that sucks the vitality out of those
around him on his constant feeding frenzy of admiration.
Breaking up with a histrionic narcissist? Be prepared for the battle
of your life! While you are an emotional basketcase, he is as Cold as Ice!
While you are left holding down the fort and dealing with the real-life
responsibilities, he walks away from everything leaving you to mop off
his stage and pay his bills. He will punish you in ways you couldn't possibly
have ever imagined...
even acknowledge it to himself! Why? Because he's off charming the socks
off of new women as if your years together didn't even
ex continually acts in abusive, bewildering and confusing ways. He is
not above committing destructive acts. When the breakup becomes a reality,
it is likely that his 'false persona' will completely disappear all together
and you will most likely experience the most hurtful of behavior from him.
He is completely lacking in empathy, and - since he is not receiving any
admiration from you anymore - he will dismiss you and discard you as
worthless to him, consequently dropping any fake front that he use to put
up in order to keep you in the relationship. Click here to join us at our 'Breaking Up & Dealing With
a Narcissist' community brought to you by Tigress Luv
Because the narcissist is so dependent
upon this love and admiration from others he will go to great lengths to
make sure that his 'fake image', or rather the 'persona' that he displays
for others is of the utmost lovable and beautiful. He goes above and beyond
to create a perfect, gentle, compassionate, 'lovable' image in order to gain
the admiration and adoration of others.
The more his reflection gains this desired status (whether it be fear,
admiration, adulation, love, respect, awe, etc.) the more removed he becomes
from his 'real' self and the more pronounced his false, projected image becomes.
He lives to impress and he loves only his impression.
In reality, the narcissist loves not anyone, not even himself, but rather
falls in love with the 'impression' he makes upon others, and falsely feels
love toward those who are most in awe of this 'impression'. Should the object
of his love suddenly see through his fake image and find fault or flaw in
his 'real' self, he will become outraged and full of disdain, disrespect,
and an intense and contemptuous dislike and despite for that person. In a
heartbeat his love for that person will become replaced with a loathsome
disgust. His real self has been discovered and revealed.
Most narcissists will run just as fast as they can from someone who has removed
his mask and revealed his true identity, whether or not that person actually
likes their real identity, or not, doesn't matter. The narcissist cannot
risk acknowledging, even to himself, that his false ego is just that - false.
For more information on surviving a narcissist read my digital report about my own, ten-year experience of living with a narcissist here, at my narcissist advice website, BreakingUpWithYourNarcisist.com
(Join Tigress Luv's 'breaking up with a narcissist' online support group now, and get all her reports on the narcissistic-ex FREE!)
The Break Up Guru, has been writing on breakups and
narcissism since the 1980's.
Visit her website at: http://www.tigressluv.com
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