The Narcissist - Running on Empty -
Out of Gas
By Linda
Martinez-Lewi Ph.D.
With all of his grandiosity, hubris,
excessive self-entitlement and trappings of success, the narcissist behind
his false persona is psychologically empty. "The narcissist's experience
of emotional emptiness is beyond longing or sadness. It is a ...pain so savage
and deep that it seems intolerable." On the outside the narcissist wears
a convincing facade that he shows the world and believes is his true reality.
These feelings of emptiness are unconscious but they are activated in every
aspect of his personal and professional life. The darkness behind the mask
appears in the narcissist's perpetual outbursts of rage, his paranoia, his
desperate hunger to fill the emptiness with accolades and the adoration of
a golden circle of admirers, his hatred of those who are capable of giving
and receiving love, and a deep self-loathing that beneath it all, he is a
fraud.
ARTICLE
CONTINUED BELOW
Breaking up with a histrionic narcissist? Be prepared for the battle
of your life! While you are an emotional basketcase, he is as Cold as Ice!
While you are left holding down the fort and dealing with the real-life
responsibilities, he walks away from everything leaving you to mop off
his stage and pay his bills. He will punish you in ways you couldn't possibly
have ever imagined...
....and not
even acknowledge it to himself! Why? Because he's off charming the socks
off of new women as if your years together didn't even
exist!
The narcissistic
ex continually acts in abusive, bewildering and confusing ways. He is
not above committing destructive acts. When the breakup becomes a reality,
it is likely that his 'false persona' will completely disappear all together
and you will most likely experience the most hurtful of behavior from him.
He is completely lacking in empathy, and - since he is not receiving any
admiration from you anymore - he will dismiss you and discard you as
worthless to him, consequently dropping any fake front that he use to put
up in order to keep you in the relationship. Click
here to read 'Breaking Up With
a Narcissist' by Tigress Luv
From early childhood a false self was
crafted by his parent(s). He grew up believing that he was a superior being.
This young child has never been loved for his unique qualities as an individual.
He was the cruel invention of parents who used him to fulfill their dreams
of glory and to assuage their feelings of worthlessness. In some instances
the parent(s) is narcissistic. The child learns to model the narcissistic
parent's attitudes of superiority and emotional distance. Early in his life
the future narcissist's normal psychological development is arrested. The
making of a grandiose false self is well under way.
The narcissist is restless and
psychologically hungry as a result of his unconscious feelings of emptiness.
Like a ravenous animal he is constantly seeking the food of ego gratifications.
These include ruthless manipulation of professional rivals, obsessive acquisition
of material possessions, collecting ever new attractive, youthful romantic
partners, relentless pursuit of associations with the powerful, and continuous
re-telling of stories that illustrate his brilliance and
superiority.
Narcissists do not age gracefully. Their
life-long lack of any meaningful relationships catches up with them and,
ultimately, facing death at the very time when their insight should be at
its peak, they are instead in a state of despair and regret which is too
little too late.
AUTHOR
CREDIT
Linda Martinez-Lewi holds a Ph.D. in clinical
psychology and is a licensed marriage family therapist. She has extensive
clinical training in narcissistic and borderline disorders. Dr. Linda
Martinez-Lewi is the author of the book "Freeing Yourself From the Narcissist
in Your Life."
Dr. Martinez-Lewi has worked for many
years with patients experiencing psychological problems as a result of personal
and professional relationships with narcissistic personality disorders. She
has clinical experience treating patients suffering from childhood trauma,
anxiety disorders, and depression.
Dr. Martinez-Lewi has been interviewed
on numerous radio talk shows throughout the country.
Visit her website
at:http://www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Article Source:
http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Linda_Martinez-Lewi_Ph.D.
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